Even In This, There is Peace

Our electricity went out just before 1:00 this morning. When the alarm woke me from a light doze at 5:30 AM, power still hadn't been restored.

I woke up sleep-deprived, grumpy, and thinking of everything no power meant for my morning:
  • A workout in the dark with no Grace & Frankie to distract me from the fact I had voluntarily left my bed before dawn to torture myself with cardio.
  • No daylight lamp to give me the wakeup (and mood) boost I desperately needed.
  • A seriously cold shower after my workout.
  • No tea (read: no caffeine) with breakfast.

T.G.I.F. 

On the bright side, I could still meditate. The thought of enjoying those few moments of undisturbed silence cheered me up quite a bit.

As I settled in for my morning meditation, the power surges started. And they didn't stop. This caused our battery backups to beep incessantly.

I grumbled.

Then I smiled.

To put it delicately, my morning had been shot all to hell. Nothing had gone according to plan. The routines I depend on for a successful start to the day had been disrupted beyond repair.

But as the battery backups beeped (why are they so annoying?), I had a thought:

Even in this, there is peace.

With that thought, I laughed. Not ruefully, but joyfully. 

And then I closed my eyes and meditated to the beeping.

We are faced with so much uncertainty. I could add "especially now," but that would be melodramatic. And untrue.

We are always faced with uncertainty. We just trick ourselves into thinking we aren't. 

Life is capricious. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying to themselves out loud and within your earshot. Whether it's a power outage disrupting your morning routine, a polar vortex in May, murder hornets, economic instability, or a global pandemic, no one can know or control how life will change from one moment to the next. 

Even in this, there is peace.

The only thing we can control is how we respond to our ever-changing circumstances. Our default is to react with fear and resistance, which usually manifests as irritation or anger. But once we accept - truly accept - that most of the things which bother us are uncertainties no one can control, our frowns turn to smiles. Our grumbles to laughter.

We say to life, "I see you, and you're beautiful. No matter how screwed up you seem to be at the moment, I accept you. Doesn't mean I approve of you or even like you, but that's not your fault. You do you, and I'll work on me."

This annoys people. Lots of them. This kind of acceptance is not "normal." You shouldn't accept what you don't like! You should "Do Something" to "Change Things!" Never mind everyone has different ideas about what should be Done or Changed or that those ideas are usually focused outward on things no one can really control, anyway.

Accepting uncertainty is the only thing that can Change Things.

Accepting uncertainty changes us.

Unsettling?

Even in this, there is peace.

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